God Madness Is A Good Madness

A share from a devotee’s letter on his first visit to Ganeshpuri and Sri Ramana Maharshi’s Ashram.

Ganeshpuri.

I lost my mind and found God. There was that day I spent reflecting that unhappiness was a memory and that happiness was the natural state of being.

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Banyan tree that Bhagawan Nityananda used to sit under.

The tree out the front is a portal like Ganeshpuri is a portal. But unlike Ganeshpuri where the Shakti is like a constant earthquake. And the spirit world is immediate.

What Bhagavan Nityananda gave me I can’t describe except in a child’s terms. It is like he gave me a Willy Wonka lolly, like the endless tasting chewing gum of Shakti. It is like he put a lingam in my head and said ‘off you go.’ It is nuts but I have the rest of the trip to bring this into a meaningful context and apply it in the real world. 

From the Goddesses of the temple with eyes that emitted blue light, to seeing a blue light like a mist coming from me and in my mala beads. And some being telling me I have not left Siddha Loka yet. Then saying a week later ‘you have left Siddha Loka.’ Well what reference does even a spiritual nut like myself have to measure such experiences?

I knew my mental state had become more normal.

But other than to say Bhagavan gave me all the Shakti I needed then and more for the road. 

I know I have the Shakti at home in my meditation. I feel Bhagavan has given me a great gift and I have reformed a personal relationship with a place and perhaps even a guru from a previous existence.

I can only say that Ganeshpuri felt like the most natural place on earth. There was only what was real and no unreal, no pretending. And I lost my mind. God madness is good madness.

See if you can make sense of that. I’m only just getting my head around it.

I know now why Bhagavan Nityananda did not speak or convey teachings. How can you sustain a normal conversation for longer than a few minutes in that place? It is too easy to slip away.

This week I found that my spiritual name is a name of Lord Krishna, I like it, thanks Guruji.

Steadily I’m coming down to earth and the more unreal it seems that all of this happens. But I’m not worried. I have a deep faith in God.

I am not concerned with the fluctuations of my waking mind.

It’s said that we lose the feeling of Ganeshpuri when we return to Australia.  I say to that, ‘so what–why should I care?’ If it is that natural then it’s the way it is supposed to be.

Funny! I had this idea that I once lived in or close to Ganeshpuri as a Muslim. The place felt as comfortable as a childhood place I left and then returned to later in life. There was a strong sense of familiarity about the place.

Inshallah!

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Arunachala, the mountain Ramana Maharshi worshipped.

Arunachala.

Sri Ramana is the gentlest of souls. Truly the love and peace of this place is at first too much. Juxtaposed is the power of the mountain [Arunachala] which exudes Shakti.

But unlike Ganeshpuri where the Shakti is like a constant earthquake. And the spirit world is immediate. Ramana Ashram is the perfect cure for this power and turmoil and madness.

But as time went by the turmoil settles like dirt in a jar of agitated water. And the peace of the place becomes apparent in oneself.

Enough for now. God bless. With love.

The Fountain of Grace

The swish of the broom lingers on the edge of my mind as I sit to meditate with Bhagawan. I look up and the temple sweeper, an elderly Indian woman, slightly bent from ageing, casually dusts the carpets in the early morning. One hand is on the broom and one is resting comfortably on her back. I imagine the silent prayers to Bhagawan she speaks as she does her work. Thousands and thousands pairs of feet have walked through this temple seeking Guru’s grace. I am fortunate to be one of them.

Everything is impermanent said the Buddha. There is nothing in the outer world that remains stable, or lasts forever. But here, in Ganeshpuri, the Shakti is the same. Shiva is the same. Bhagawan is the same; Muktananda is the same. That Consciousness never changes. This temple is a refuge, a well from which devotees can sip the deepest waters.

Mandagni Mountain stands as a custodian of the Tansa valley and the village. Mandagni seems ancient. As Kailas is to Shiva, as Arunachala is to Ramana Maharshi, Mandagni is to Guruji. During his years with Baba he saluted its majesty every day.

The valley is mysterious. Legend says that sages did fire ceremonies here and that the Pandava princes stayed here when they were in exile. And even with the smoke from the brick factories, the stench of human excrement, the physical tapasya, the heat and dust it is the most magical place I have ever visited. Discomfort disappears in the presence of Bhagawan whose aura of purity and Shakti sanctifies the valley. The Shakti and peace of the mountain is apparent.

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Tansa River and Valley

A few years ago I was inspired to climb Mandagni when a local swami told me there was a cave two thirds of the way up where Bhagawan meditated. Once a volcano, its cliffs are lava covered and the heat from its former eruptions fuel the hot springs.

Baba once said that celibate cobras with jewels in their foreheads lived there, as well as leopards, meditating yogis and other wild creatures. I saw none of that but the cave is there and it is a cozy nook for meditation. Someone has put a small statue of Bhagawan and built a yagna pit. I could imagine Bhagawan and other yogis meditating there.

One morning Guruji said, ‘we are fortunate to be here in the fountain of grace. For those whose hearts are open to the Guru will experience the love and Shakti of my Guru and my Paramaguru. I am blessed, we are blessed; devotees of the Guru are blessed.’

‘Also,’ he said, ‘any day you can sit under Mandagni Mountain is a good day.’